So today I blew a fuse making salad
I don’t mean “blew a fuse” figuratively either, although I did get a bit panicked at one point.
I had set up my breadmaker in the morning and it was due to finish around lunch, but I got tired of waiting for it and decided to get started on the salad and just eat the bread afterward, whenever it finished. I put the turkey bacon in the microwave. I know this might seem strange to some of you since everyone else I know makes bacon in their frying pan, but my family has done it in the microwave for as long as I can remember. Except if it’s a holiday when we have a lot of people over for brunch, in which case we make it in the microwave and the frying pan for maximum speed.
So the bacon is going and the lettuce is washed and I am digging out the pepper as the salad spinner winds down when all of a sudden the noise from the microwave stops. Not stops like ding! it’s finished, but just ceases. Weird. The fridge isn’t making much noise either. Power outage? No, the clock on the stove is still on. I open the fridge door. No light. Quickly, I close the door. Well, colour me confuzzled. I even briefly wondered if the clock on the stove ran on a battery which makes no sense at all, doubly so since I have seen it stop working during a previous outage. Computer still works. Cordless phone still works. Toaster still works. Bedroom stuff still works. TV does not work. So three sets of outlets, spread across multiple rooms of my apartment have stopped working. And that’s when I remember.
The bread wasn’t done. I haul the breadmaker over to a working outlet and plug it back in. It just flashes the default time of 3:50 at me. I try to hit start anyway, but it just says “hot” and then goes back to blinking 3:50. I decide to believe the breadmaker is complimenting me. I am desperately trying to recall when I put the ingredients in but can’t. I figure there is between 1 and 2 hours to go, but can’t say exactly. I think that means it was either rising or just starting baking, but again I can’t be certain. Okay, fine. I turn on the oven to 350. I have lots of cookbooks where I could look up a bread-baking temperature, but in my mind there’s no time. I have already wasted too much determining what outlets work. Besides, everything worth eating that I can think of bakes at 350.
I dig out my one bread pan, which is less than half the volume of the breadmaker’s container, invert the breadmaker container, raise my arms above my head and swing them down as hard as I can, stopping just above the bread pan. Thunk. One ball of dough successfully in bread pan. Thank you inertia. I didn’t even have to dig out the little stir bar thing since that stayed in the container. I sort of poke the dough out to fill the pan and then throw it in the oven, even before the preheat has fully finished. I set a mental timer to check on it in forty minutes or so.
Okay, crisis #1, well, not averted, but under control. Next, the fridge. Fortunately, there is another outlet right next to the fridge that is working, so I just have to get at the plug and move it. This basically involves me standing on the left side of the fridge and pushing it as far right-and-forward as it will go in its little nook, then running around to the right side of the fridge and pushing as far left-and-forward as the nook allows. Repeat until you collapse or can reach the plug. This I manage in probably only eight or nine half-trips around my refrigerator and my food is safe from bacteria once again.
Now, about that salad. I unplug the microwave. I’m pretty tired of hauling appliances around my apartment at this point so I plugged it into the power strip the breadmaker had been in and stretched it across to another outlet. The microwave ran about 20 seconds and then shut down again. I was worried I had blown yet another fuse, but that outlet still seemed to be working. Nevertheless it seemed safest to give up on the microwave. I mean, I have definitely used my breadmaker, microwave and fridge all at once before (crazy as it may sound, I actually like to have my fridge on all the time), but maybe something happened to my microwave while I was away or…I don’t know, but the microwave and power strip are the common factors in the shut downs, so I decided not to chance it. I finished off the turkey bacon in the frying pan, cut up the pepper, grated some cheese and then…SALAD. Only, like, an hour after I started.
The bread came out okay by the way. Weirdly shaped as it overflowed the pan and the crust is a bit tough (possibly because I didn’t wait for the preheat to finish), but definitely recognizable as bread. Given the circumstances, I’m actually kind of proud of it.
As for the fuse, I checked Youtube and managed to find the fusebox, but I don’t have an extra fuse and can’t even tell by looking at the fuses which one is busted, which supposedly you are supposed to be able to do, so in the end I figured it was just safer to submit a work order to the maintenance office and let the apartment owners deal with it. One of the joys of renting: you don’t have to tinker with electricity when you’re not sure what you’re doing. All right, well it’s 5:30 here, so in case lunch is any indication, I should probably get started on dinner if I want to eat before Tuesday. Wish me luck.